Redefining the Eating Disorder Experience

I want to let you in on the healing path behind my deepest darkest secret. I want everyone who has struggled with addiction and/or disorder to really listen to what I'm going to say. It's a radical way of thinking and it's not an interpretation that is widely accepted, but it's what's worked for me. This is about why I forged my own healing path and would encourage you to do the same.

I don't view my experience with an eating disorder as wrong, bad, or something I never wish had happened.

My eating disorder was a strict teacher, and one I'm eternally grateful for.

It's something that gave me a new lens to look through on life and now I'm happier, more at peace, more successful and more in touch with myself than I ever have been before. It helped me change deeply ingrained & negative patterns of thought, helped me get it touch with who I am and what the heck I'm here on this planet to do, reminded me to check in with myself before just following down the path that's "normal" and the most widely accepted. It helped me learn how to love myself and others, how to read my body's needs and let go of thoughts that don't serve me. This is just a short list of the things that have shifted in me, but the outcome is huge and I want you to know exactly how I got here.

An Alternative Path to Recovery
I watched Mark Hyman's TedMed video and was finally able to put words to why I forged my own healing path from an eating disorder. The term 'eating disorder' is just the name that's given to people who describe having a similar group of symptoms (i.e. binging, purging, starving themselves, feeling depressed, using laxatives excessively, etc, etc). These symptoms are what the traditional medical system treats. This is the flaw. The symptoms are not the why, they are not the root of the eating disorder. They are just part of the outcome.

The traditional system gives us pills and medication to treat the symptoms, which may help some people in the short-term - but the root cause has not even been addressed. Why did the eating disorder appear in this person at this specific time in their life in the first place? If that piece doesn't get healed then the body and the mind will come up with another way to express it and try again. The eating disorder can turn into severe depression, anxiety attacks, a disease, whatever the body and mind needs to do to get your attention and get healed from the inside out.

After trying the traditional system, medications and doctors, my experience was that it didn't work. I didn't heal. In fact, my eating disorder was even getting worse at that point. I started looking into more natural healing methods.

Healing Tools
I dropped into my first yoga class while attending ASU. I was 21 or 22 years old. This changed everything for me. I felt something the moment I walked into the studio. I knew I had opened up a door that I wanted to walk through. Just the yoga studio itself felt peaceful and healing - unlike a doctors office. I went twice a week for a while and this was the beginning of a process that has helped me chip away at the 'why' behind my eating disorder, helped the symptoms, and continues to keep me focused on my path.

This post would be too long if I detailed out how everything else happened, but I will tell you my list of key healing tools so you can look into them if you like. I call them healing tools because they are the things I've turned to when shit got tough. They all require a lot of introspection and work. None of them are easy. They all work like a good book; you can practice them forever and you'll get something new out of it each time. You'll feel like an onion, having your layers peeled back and peeled back and peeled back. They all help you get in tune with nature and what's natural for you. Here's the list in no particular order:

Yoga
Meditation
Breathwork
Journaling
Ayurveda
Raw Foods
Herbs and plant medicine
Gardening/ Farming
Strong support system
Art
Having a meaningful job

The Facts
Eating disorders are so prevalent right now and I think it's obvious the traditional way of healing isn't working because things are getting worse instead of better. I still get shocked when reading the stats:

In the United States, as many as 10 million females and 1 million males are fighting a life and death battle with an eating disorder such as anorexia or bulimia.
0.5% - 3.7% of females suffer from Anorexia Nervosa in their lifetime
1.1% - 4.2% of females suffer from Bulimia Nervosa in their lifetime
2% - 5% of the American population experience Binge Eating Disorder
10%-25% of all those battling anorexia will die as a direct result of the eating disorder
Up to 19% of college aged women in America are bulimic
1 in 5 women struggle with an eating disorder or disordered eating.

I offer up my outlook and experience as an alternative to try...a new path to start down. I think addictions and disorders show up in our lives to let us see parts of ourselves that need healing. If we do the work and don't just look to suppress the symptoms we'll become more fulfilled and whole. It's insanely difficult to get through, I know first hand. In fact, it takes a mountain of fortitude - it still does for me at this point. But it's worth it to do it this way. There are people and practices that can support you. The result is worth the million efforts you'll have to make to let go of old patterns and habits. The world needs you to do this work because we're all connected in some way and you're healing process will have an effect on the collective. If you choose heal yourself in a way that also supports the well-being of our environment, everyone wins.

happy individual = happy family = happy community = happy earth. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.